Coucou, hello! I have been in Paris for a bit over a month now. Though I have experienced so much, it feels like time has went by incredibly fast. I’ve grown quite a bit from the first day I landed in Paris and felt somewhat clumsy using the metro or weighing produce for groceries. I was in awe by the supermarkets and variety in the dairy and produce section, which seems quite mundane to most French people.
My very first week of work was a huge learning curve. In the US, during past jobs, I have always received clear and detailed steps to accomplishing a task, or told exactly what my boss or supervisor wanted me to do. It was very particular. In France, I received very general instructions and it was up to me how I decided to accomplish a task. So I felt very confused and lost, fearing that my supervisor would end up disliking my results. But this was not the case at all. In France, at least in academia, people seem to prefer that you try things on your own and conduct independent research and fail a bit, rather than having to give you the correct answer.
On a scale of tourist to native Parisian, I’d say I feel very comfortable with the city even if not a local. If I were to visit again with family and friends, I’d be very confident guiding them around and planning activities for the day. In terms of language, conversations feel much more organic and I do not have to think or pause as much. I’ve even started adding discourse markers like “bah” or “ben” into my speech!
It has been difficult for me to finally get past the French language barrier, for sure. My first two weeks, I had to often ask my supervisor to repeat himself when explaining things to me. And during lunch breaks, I understood a fraction of what everyone else was discussing. People were polite and accommodating, so I did get to talk and get to know people, but the pace at which I participated in conversations was much slower than everyone else.
Furthermore, French people can definitely be quite direct. I will say that this did not hurt my feelings or make me feel upset. However, it can be shocking and I am often unsure of how to respond to certain things; being used to American politeness, I do not know what would be direct enough to still be respectful. Over a text message, I often receive very blunt and dry responses with no attempt to sugarcoat or make things sound polite. In person, sometimes, people give advice or make suggestions in blunt and direct ways. But realizing that it is out of an aim to help and be efficient helps me understand more.
The etiquette around lunch breaks and coffee breaks is also not quite clear to me. Sometimes, I see people taking lunch breaks that last from an hour to an hour and thirty minutes. But at the same time, there are people who only take thirty to forty minutes of a break. Seeing this variation makes me unsure of what the right length of a break is. I am sure there is more context and reasoning behind when a longer break is expected or acceptable, but I am not sure. I do believe, however, that taking the effort to talk to people and network with everyone is valued, so a short lunch break is better than no break at all. No matter what I do, my strategies are to be humble and communicate as much as I can. Communication is not just speaking; even if my French is still a bit slow sometimes, showing people that I remember stuff they told me or helping them goes a long way.
My understanding of American culture has definitely changed! Messages and emails are often friendly and a bit energetic, with exclamation marks and sometimes smiley faces, even in professional culture. In France, though some places are becoming more globalized, it is uncommon. People have a very professional tone with emails. On the other hand, for in-person conversations, people seem to be a lot more informal compared to the US, especially considering that the environment is academic. One time, I could hear my coworkers singing Katy Perry songs in the hallway! There are exceptions to this though; being informal with the boss is strange, since the culture is very hierarchical.
I think American culture is also more receptive to asking questions. One common American phrase stands out to me: “No question is a dumb question.” People do not invite questions often after explanations, unless it is some sort of presentation or speech. Here, once people tell you something, it is assumed it won’t be repeated. However, it does not mean that there is no way to get feedback or corrections. My way of figuring out what to do has been telling my supervisor my plan and waiting for them to correct me.
I am looking forward to making the most of the time I have left here and enjoying what Paris has to offer!